Mark it zero!

You´re out of your element! Mark it zero, mark it zero! You think I´m f#cking around - you´ll mark it zero! Hey folks, how r you? Uh huh, uh huh, good. Cool, well today is the day Lew flys to Japan to begin his sabbatical, that kid should be on the flight now, nearly there in fact, so stay tuned for msgs and pics from that warrior once he gets himself sorted.Gonna be a wacky year with us travelling seperately, the best mates usually like to stick together when exploring but this is wing-spread time and two totally different, contrasting experiences- Lewstar in Japan, wild culture shock, food, peeps, cities, music and media, whilst The V.Man is out in the arctic like something from that cool Goldeneye level on the N64, Severnaya, I´m here with the Icelanders. Ive gotta tell ya, some of the friendliest people ur ever gonna meet, everyone who I work with has been so welcoming and funny, and once u get to know ur average Joe on the street that kid will support you through thick and thin.Work. Its minus 8 today, f#cking cold to say the least, it snowed a couple of days ago and now the snow is frosted over, like an ice rink, well funny watching peeps go for the ride. Just to let u know I am having the best time, I´m safe and well and loving spending time with my new friends at work and at home. So its been a while since I typed up any news, so I´m gonna list any events I can remember now because I find it easier and funnier that way, don´t expect it in chronological order either because its flooding back like a flashback, The V. cant control the flow.

1- Xmas was too funny. Worked our asses off until 24th (thats when Icelanders celebrate) and on the real Xmas (25th), we cooked and chilled all day and I stayed up till 4am with Adam watching Big Lebowski, hence why I have found myself unable to cease quoting lines from the film.

2- Went to this little town called Akranes, about an hour from Reykjavik, a few weeks ago. Its a beautiful little fishing village and it was good to get out in the sticks and have a good scout out of what its like to be in "isolated" Iceland, although I know that there are settlements here much more isolated. Beautiful though.

3- Went to The Perlan, this big building in Rvk where u get a killer view of the whole city, witness my photo. No h#rsesh#t either, I told Lew about this, I saw the hot blonde one from the band NYLON in there and she was eyeing up The V.Man like there was no tomorrow, cant believe I didnt bust a groove.

4-Went to a house party this weekend just passed, silly funny. Home at 5. Nice.

5- Spent New Year at my friend Annas place, had a beauty dinner there before we went to this traditional bonfire in Gardabae, was sweet. The came the fireworks, I had been forewarned but I had never witnessed as many fireworks simultaneously expiring themselves. It was insane. Icelanders spent an eyebrow raising amount on the gunpowder this year, the sales fund the mountain rescue and they can sustain their activities comfortably all year round, solely thanks to the two week Xmas period where Icelanders throw caution to the wind and surrender their bank balances to the notion "F#ck it, its once a year."

New Year was class. Then went to this house party afterwards where this guy asked me to drive him to the other side of Rvk, because I was the only sober person at the party. Oh, an experience, u try stopping a Toyota Corolla doing 85kmh downhill on summer tyres. It was Casino Royale style as I approached the intersection, but The V.Man held firm and pulled it off - score.

6- Watched Casino Royale. Again. Legendary.

7-Swimming my ass off all the time. I have the funniest story ever to write about in my next instalment regarding my water slide activities. Utter class.

8- Spat toothpaste off my balcony window.

9- Made a Napoleon Dynamit video of me dancing to Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger by Daft Punk. It will get You - tubed.

10- Bought a Kip Dynamite t-shirt just to make fun of French room mate Kip Dynamite. I dig it.

11- Had another customer at the store ask me out. What is going on? Is there something in the water?

12- Received excellent Pavel Nedved model as Xmas gift from Roberto Baggio-loving housemate Alessandra.

13-Watching Pick of Destiny this weekend.

14- Snowboarding in 2 weeks.

15- Potential skydive next month. Lets see how the pennies map out.

16- Threw a kumquat at work colleague Sigur Ros which was a direct hit on the forehead and resulted in her retalation- return fire of said kumquat. V.Man repelled fire using cardboard box, and then threw a potato at work colleague Hordur. Result - bruise on his thigh. Couldnt sit down for a week.

17- Ogled Caridee from Americas Next Top Model with roommate Adam. Score.

18- Flying fireworks set off dangerously near Annas dads gas cannisters. Mercifully, no crater but lethal if it had gone wrong.

19- Ghostbusting with Fusi. Witness the photo.

20- Watching Queer Eye for the Straight Guy religiously with all housemates. Fabulous darling. Worrying though.

21- Met this dud ewho played Coldplay "Clocks" on piano perfectly at a house party, and also Speed of Sound. Hero time.

22- No joke- green spider found in another of our stores, at Smaralind, some dude bought broccoli and took it home. Whilst preparing his appetiser, the purchaser found he got more than he bargained for, as right there looking at him was this foreign species, totally unwelcome in this climate and highly dangerous. Authorities called- situation diffused. However, took it upon myself to be Chairman of the Green Spider commitee, and spent half an hour of works time drawing a poster warning of the dangers of broccoli dwelling arachnids and that we are in way over our heads due to the surprise atctics executed by the spiders. Witness the photo next time.

Well thats all folks for now, I cant remember half the stuff thats happened because its been so long since I wrote a story, but stay tuned. Remember, the next time someone rear-ends u, dont just turn the other cheek, who ya gonna call? Thats right, Hagkaup.