Okay, so I wasn’t really sure what to write about in this article. Sometimes you have just seen so much and so many things have happened, and therefore it is hard to sit down at a computer and talk about all of it. So I have decided to title this entry “All the things I think are weird about Timor and its people.” There are many things in this country that sometimes I find totally backwards or wacky or stupid or just don’t get. I would like to share them with you.
First off, they love to call you fat. Because of all the malnutrition problems here, the Timorese love a good, fat body. One, because it is a sign that you have money because you are fed well. And two, it really makes you stand out from a crowd of skinny, skinny, skinny little brown people. It is hard though because many of the female volunteers have gained weight since coming to Timor, and the Timorese love to point it out. I don’t know how many times I have been told “isin sai” which means my body has grown. They also like to pinch my arms and tell me I’m “bukur” or fat. To us, it is a little upsetting, but to them they have just given you a great, great compliment. When describing people in a story or pinpointing someone on the street, they will be like, this guy, the one with the “isin boot” or the big body. When I show them pictures from home they point out all the fat people. But, what I don’t get is that, if they love fat bodies so much, why don’t they eat more. Even when they do have the money and lots of meat and good food, all they will eat is rice. Their meals will consist of a huge bowl of rice and maybe like one spoonful of spinach on top. If you love fat so much, eat some more!!!
They second thing is they have no concept of like racial insults. For years they have been discriminated against, but they will still walk right up to you and be like, wow, you are so white. When they see Bacary, a volunteer from the Ivory Coast, they say “metan loss!!” which means you are so black!! They tell my friend James, who is asian, that he must be from China because “oin hanesan” or that his face looks just like a Chinaman’s. As I get darker and darker from being in the sun all the time, they tell me that soon I too will be “ema timor” with black skin.
Another thing that really bothers me is the staring. In America, it is so rude to stare. Most of the time, if you catch someone staring at you, they will quickly look away. That is so not the case here. I used to feel really weird walking around in town, because people will stare at you as soon as you are in eyesight and not take their eyes off of you until you are out of eyesight. At first I was to embarrassed to look people in the eye, but now it ticks me off, so I stare right back. And they just keep right on staring. They don’t even blink.
Another thing is the touching. You don’t have to worry too much, because people of the opposite sex don’t touch. For a man to touch a woman in anyway in a public setting or in front of other people is very unacceptable. Same goes for women touching men. The men in my office will never ever come near me. Not even a tap on the shoulder. But the women!! They are all over me! They love to hold my hand, and pinch me, and smack my arms, and touch my hair. Sometimes you don’t even know them!! I don’t know how many times I have gotten into a car, and some old woman will sit down next to me and put her hand on my leg or hold my arm or smack me. I will meet women in the street while walking, and then we will walk the rest of the way with her arm around my waste or something. It is really pretty funny. Can be a little awkward sometimes. The same goes for men. People of the same sex who are friends are very “cuddly.” You will often see two men walking down the street holding hands. Something you NEVER see in the U.S. I think it is pretty hard for the male volunteers to get used to that, because our culture is like the exact opposite.
Another thing is that things in America that are soooooooo embarrassing to talk about are no big deal here. For example, diarrhea, which is a biiiiiiiiiig problem here. You have diarrhea, and everyone knows, and everyone well ask you “kabun moras, ga?” I feel like if someone asked me if I had diarrhea in the U.S., I would turn bright red. But here they just ask, no big deal. And when you are sick, the people you live with tell the whole neighborhood, so the next day, as you walk to work, everyone and their mother is like hey, heard you had diarrhea.
If you ever eat something in front of someone, you always have to offer some to them. Either that or tell them that you are eating. For example, if I want to drink some water from my water-bottle, and there are people around me, I basically have to announce that I am going to drink out of it. If you don’t, then you “foti an” or “choose yourself.” Even if you only have one of something, or it is all you have for lunch, or its only like a small cup of coffee, if there are people around, you have to offer some to them. Sometimes it is just stupid because, like, guys in the office are drinking coffee, and they tell me to drink some, and there is like a drop left, and I’m like mmmmmmm.. I really want that last drop of coffee, thanks, that backwash was delicious. But it is their social obligation to offer it to you. It goes both ways in that if something is offered, you have to accept. Sometimes it really sucks because if its like lunchtime, and you haven’t eaten yet, and people know you haven’t eaten yet, and they offer you food, you have to eat it. Even if you just take two bites, its okay, you just have to accept. Even if you don’t want to eat their food and you know your mom has a huge meal waiting for you at home, you have to eat it, or you “foti an.”
Okay, so finally, last but not least, is that Timorese love to state the obvious. Or at least question about the obvious. For example, every weekday I leave the house around 8 to walk to work. Every day, same time. And everymorning my uncle is hanging out on the porch, and sure enough, EVERY morning he asks me “ba servisu?” which means “going to work?” and every day I say yes. Its like clockwork. When I am knee deep in river water with all my laundry and soap suds everywhere people come by and ask me “fase ropa?” (are you washing clothes) and i’m like, no, i’m reading a book right now, can’t you tell?? duh.
Oh, and one more, malaria. If you have any type of illness, in the slightest way, like a minor headache, or maybe a cut on your foot, or your back is sore, then you must have malaria. That’s right, its always malaria, could never be anything else. Sometimes I yawn and my mom is like are you tired, and I reply yes, and she says wow you are tired a lot, maybe you have malaria. What is even more amazing is the causes of this rapidly spreading disease. I mean of course mosquitos transmit it, but apparently you can get it from cold cement. When I am walking around the house barefoot at night, my mom tells me to put my flipflops on or I will get malaria. Cause you know, flipflops are good insulators. I am not allowed to be outside when it is raining or I might get malaria. I am also not allowed to shower at night or I will definitely, most definitely, get malaria.
Hope you enjoyed my rants.
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